I watched Nina Rycroft‘s A Beginner’s Guide to Drawing a Self Portrait on Skillshare last night. I thought that’s what I would try to do for day two of Find Your Flow. I woke up this morning, and the desire to dive right in to drawing wasn’t there. I have this belief that I have to be in the mood to draw (which I’m hoping to curb by participating in this program for thirty days straight). Rather than push it, I decided to run some errands, have some lunch, and then sit down to draw.
I wonder why things always look so much easier to do in a video (ha! ha!). I guess it’s a good thing because it suckers me into believing I can do it so I’m not as resistant to trying. Anyway, I began to draw and immediately got frustrated. It was not working out as effortlessly for me as it was for Nina on the video. I have this intolerance for the learning process and what it produces. In my writing and my art practice, I think perfection should just come flowing out of me effortlessly. Clearly, that’s never going to happen, but I hopelessly cling to that belief anyway. To ease my frustration, I took a break and than came back to it. I was still immensely frustrated. The final result is not what I imagined in my mind, but I reminded myself that taking part in this program is about building skills and a daily art practice, not about perfect outcomes. Success is measured in sitting down and drawing every day for thirty days; nothing else. So, here is my self-portrait: